A demo day, an offsite, an accelerator batch, a founder dinner. Every company in the room gets the obituary it earned, read aloud or handed out on cards. It is the only talk anyone remembers.
One obituary per company, written from the real thing: their deck, their site, their repo, whatever they put in front of the world. A name for the dead thing, the eulogy, the cause of death, what it is survived by. Every card in every shape, so it goes straight into the group chat. A host's script that reads the room in the order it deserves. And a private wall for the cohort, which they can vote to make public if they dare.
Send the list and the date. The obituaries are written and checked by a person before anyone sees them, because a room is not the internet: nothing about a person's health, family, body or background, ever. The work, the pitch and the choices are the only targets. You read them, or it is read live on a call. Two days' notice is enough for a batch of ten.
From $299 for up to ten companies, then $25 for each one after. A live reading on a call adds $150. Paid by PayPal or invoice before the date. If the cohort is a nonprofit, a school, or a first-time founder programme, say so and the price comes down.